“Make room in your hearts for us…”
(2 Corinthians 7:2)
Have you ever been searching for a parking spot in a busy lot? You drive around in circles like a hunter stalking its prey. Then, that magical moment when you see a person walking to their car, keys in hand, “That spot is MINE!” you say to yourself. You position your car to make your claim on the spot clear to all in proximity. They open the door. They enter the car. They fasten their seatbelt. Their tail lights light up and the exhaust gases begin to putter. You wait for what seems like a reasonable amount of time for them to back out of the space so you can claim your prize… but they just sit there!
A study conducted with hundreds of drivers proved we actually take longer to leave a parking space if we know someone is waiting. The study also showed evidence that if the waiting car honks their horn or signals their rush in some way, drivers made them wait four times longer! Experts call this phenomenon “territorialism” and it can be witnessed in any crowded space: at the DMV, the doctor’s office, in traffic, in conversation, and at restaurants. The longer the line or bigger the crowd, the longer we linger when it’s ‘our turn.’
It is easy to become selfishly territorial and refuse to make space for others in these situations but nowhere is this mentality more dangerous than in our relationship with God. Our lives are filled with so many interests, pursuits, and obligations that we sometimes struggle to find space for the stuff that matters.
Try to imagine your life as a house and the things in that house represent all the stuff you’ve said “Yes” to. The house can only hold so much. What would it look like? Would you have to navigate through rooms of junk like a minefield? Would you see tilting stacks of papers like miniature skyscrapers? Would debris be scattered on every surface so that there is no place to sit on the couch or to eat at the kitchen table? Perhaps you’ve said “Yes” to so many unnecessary things that there is no room in your life for the really important things. How can we know when our life is overcrowded? Try asking yourself the following questions:
- When you think of introducing any additional spiritual activity into your schedule, like trying to come to more of the worship services, or spending more time in prayer and personal study, does it feel like adding to an already crushing burden?
- When you think of trying to be more hospitable or making more of an effort to get to know others, does it seem impossible to have the time and energy to make such investments?
We often think being busy is an inherently good thing. But what matters is what we’re busy with. An overcrowded life will actually pervert our priorities and values and turn spiritual pursuits into obligatory checklists. (Hag. 1:2-6; Amos 8:5) If you feel spiritually drained or just overloaded, God can help. Jesus lived the fullest, freest life possible (Col. 2:9) and he did so in part by using one special word very carefully: “No.” (Lk. 4:1-13)
It’s okay to say “No” to things, especially if they might damage or comprise you in some way. “No” is a powerful word in Scripture. Joseph was an expert on saying “No” (Gen. 39:8, 12) as were Daniel and his three friends in Babylon (Dan. 1:8; 3:18; 6:13).
When Nehemiah was helping to rebuild the walls and gates of Jerusalem the enemies of God tried to pull him away from his important work. He told them, “I am doing a great work and I cannot come down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and come down to you?” (Neh. 6:3-4)
If we wield this one powerful, liberating word according to God’s wisdom, “No” can become the scalpel God uses to reshape our life. In fact, the more we say “Yes” to God and “No” to anything that pushes us away from him, the larger the capacity of our life grows until we are “filled with all the fullness of God.” (Eph. 3:19)